So this weekend, Burger and I had to have the fart talk. That's a huge step in a relationship, possibly even bigger than the DTR (determining relationship talk).

We've been hanging out a lot on weekends lately, sometimes almost the entire weekend. I feel as though it's appropriate, as a lady, to hold in my farts until I'm in the bathroom or have an alone moment. But, I'm not always sure if they are going to be loud or not, and it's not very ladylike to let out a loud fart, even in a bathroom (he might hear!) so I just have to hold them in sometimes.

This past weekend, my stomach was hurting so bad from holding my farts in that I finally decided to have the fart talk. Actually, on Saturday, when he left for awhile to go home, I farted so loud that one of the kittens was actually scared. Too much buildup. So on Saturday night, I said, I have something to tell you, basically my stomach is hurting so bad from holding my farts in and I can't do it any longer. I think he was glad we had the fart talk because he's been holding in his farts too. Now my stomach will enjoy some freedom from gas buildup.

Once a few years ago, I asked my doctor if there was some kind of medicine he could give me for excessive farting. I thought that I farted a lot more than most people (except Brandy, she is the biggest farter ever). Then I read something on the internet that said most people fart 10 or more times a day. Wow, that makes me feel better, but where are these people farting at? There is also some special seat you can put on your chair and when you fart it absorbs the smell. I secretly thought about getting one but then everyone would ask what it was and then what is the point really? Sometimes I also fart in my sleep, and once in awhile it's so loud that it kinda wakes me up.

Jessica and I were at a wine tasting a month or so ago with Berger and Michael. We went to the bathroom (after tasting MANY different wines) and some older lady farted in the stall while we were on each side of her in the stalls. I tried to be mature and hold in my laughter (cause that happens sometimes, and I'm sure it's worse when you are old) but Jessica was giggling a little bit and I knew why but I waited til we were outside the bathroom. Then we were both laughing and being immature. I think the wine helped bring out the laughter, but it was funny regardless.

There isn't really a point to this blog, except that I hate holding in my farts, but I feel as though I have to because I'm a woman. But, I guess most guys hold in their farts around women, at least until they get to know them better.