I pretty much have the best family in the world. My parents and one of my brothers, Bryan, came down this weekend to visit and to help me do some yardwork. My parents both have a green thumb and I needed help planting flowers and some tomatoes. My Dad came down after working lots of overtime last week because of the storms last weekend, so I know he was tired. He also helped bbq on Saturday too.
I know both my parents and my brother were tired but they helped dig up lots of the old plants that past homeowners before me had planted. It looked horrible. We used 15 bags of topsoil and my Dad tilled the ground and I planted a bunch of flowers and a few tomato plants. The flowers look awesome! It was a lot of work and I couldn't have done it without their help, but at least now I kinda know what I'm doing for the future. I still have to get some mulch but I'm hoping to do that this weekend.
My parents have always been eager to help me, no matter what I need. They have always helped me out financially and still do, especially when they come to visit. I don't see my brothers as often, but they always help out when needed as well.
My Mom and Dad are having their 33rd wedding anniversary this coming up weekend, so I am really happy for them. They have been awesome parents and should take credit for the great job they did raising 3 kids. I love them a lot and am so fortunate that they are my parents.
Monday, May 18, 2009
Thursday, May 14, 2009
It's been awhile
Wow, I haven't been on here in forever. It's not like anyone really reads this anyway, but I like to have a record/journal of my thoughts but I hate writing them on paper. So, electronic format works for me. Anywho...
Things are mostly going well, except for one little thing but that's not really something I want to discuss nor share with the world, so I'll keep my business private.
Relationship is good, we hit the big 6 month mark recently. Yes, for some that is no big deal, but for me it is. I usually don't keep guys around for long and I haven't in about 5 or so years. It's great to have a normal relationship with a good guy. We get along, we have lots of fun, and we have enough in common to have things to talk about but at the same time we have our own interests too. I couldn't be happier with the way things are going there.
Work is good, I was really busy for awhile but things have slowed down for a few weeks until mid-June. I taught a class at State Fair CC and let me tell you, that was interesting. Much different than anywhere else I've taught. I really don't think some of those kids really care, although I did have some really good students. I guess I'll see if I'm teaching again in the fall. I'm also teaching Zumba at the Y which is incredibly fun, but I'm having trouble getting people to sign up. If we don't have class this session or next session, I may have to look for other places to teach. All of this keeps me busy during the week, but luckily I usually don't work on weekends. Once in awhile, I will for a few hours on a Saturday if I need to.
I'm playing co-ed softball this summer. We are really bad, but we are getting a lot better with each game. We've definitely improved since our first game and we'll probably start playing good when the season is over! It's fun at least.
The house is coming along nicely, I got new bedroom furniture a few weeks ago. It was expensive but something I've wanted for awhile. My old bedroom furniture is in the guest room, so now guests have a place to sleep besides the air matress and couch. The kitties, especially Bitsy, love scratching the new furniture, but they aren't really allowed in my room much.
Mowing and weed eating are interesting tasks. I can't say that I love either one of them, but they do make the yard look nice. I think I ran over a little snake with the lawn mower the other day and it was gross. I went back to look and it wasn't moving, so either it was sleeping or dead. I'm totally terrified of snakes so I'm scared to go back and look, I hope it's dead.
Some of my family is coming to visit this weekend and hopefully my mom will help me plant some flowers. I would also like to plant a few tomato plants. The front yard will look so much better with flowers, but I need help getting started. Both of my parents have a green thumb, but I surely don't...as least not yet.
I am really excited to go on a vacation this year. I've looked at some various options but I think I'm stuck on Fort Lauderdale. I found one package to fly from Springfield (much more convienient than KC or STL) but we would have to connect in Atlanta then to Fort Lauderdale but 7 nights in a hotel on/by the beach for $400 each, for 2 people. I think that's a bargain and now I really want to go, even if I have to put it on a credit card, it is something I really need to do in the summer. I have to get away from the lake for a bit, besides my parents house. I need a beach!
That's all I can think of right now, I'll post some more interesting updates soon!
Things are mostly going well, except for one little thing but that's not really something I want to discuss nor share with the world, so I'll keep my business private.
Relationship is good, we hit the big 6 month mark recently. Yes, for some that is no big deal, but for me it is. I usually don't keep guys around for long and I haven't in about 5 or so years. It's great to have a normal relationship with a good guy. We get along, we have lots of fun, and we have enough in common to have things to talk about but at the same time we have our own interests too. I couldn't be happier with the way things are going there.
Work is good, I was really busy for awhile but things have slowed down for a few weeks until mid-June. I taught a class at State Fair CC and let me tell you, that was interesting. Much different than anywhere else I've taught. I really don't think some of those kids really care, although I did have some really good students. I guess I'll see if I'm teaching again in the fall. I'm also teaching Zumba at the Y which is incredibly fun, but I'm having trouble getting people to sign up. If we don't have class this session or next session, I may have to look for other places to teach. All of this keeps me busy during the week, but luckily I usually don't work on weekends. Once in awhile, I will for a few hours on a Saturday if I need to.
I'm playing co-ed softball this summer. We are really bad, but we are getting a lot better with each game. We've definitely improved since our first game and we'll probably start playing good when the season is over! It's fun at least.
The house is coming along nicely, I got new bedroom furniture a few weeks ago. It was expensive but something I've wanted for awhile. My old bedroom furniture is in the guest room, so now guests have a place to sleep besides the air matress and couch. The kitties, especially Bitsy, love scratching the new furniture, but they aren't really allowed in my room much.
Mowing and weed eating are interesting tasks. I can't say that I love either one of them, but they do make the yard look nice. I think I ran over a little snake with the lawn mower the other day and it was gross. I went back to look and it wasn't moving, so either it was sleeping or dead. I'm totally terrified of snakes so I'm scared to go back and look, I hope it's dead.
Some of my family is coming to visit this weekend and hopefully my mom will help me plant some flowers. I would also like to plant a few tomato plants. The front yard will look so much better with flowers, but I need help getting started. Both of my parents have a green thumb, but I surely don't...as least not yet.
I am really excited to go on a vacation this year. I've looked at some various options but I think I'm stuck on Fort Lauderdale. I found one package to fly from Springfield (much more convienient than KC or STL) but we would have to connect in Atlanta then to Fort Lauderdale but 7 nights in a hotel on/by the beach for $400 each, for 2 people. I think that's a bargain and now I really want to go, even if I have to put it on a credit card, it is something I really need to do in the summer. I have to get away from the lake for a bit, besides my parents house. I need a beach!
That's all I can think of right now, I'll post some more interesting updates soon!
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
So this weekend, Burger and I had to have the fart talk. That's a huge step in a relationship, possibly even bigger than the DTR (determining relationship talk).
We've been hanging out a lot on weekends lately, sometimes almost the entire weekend. I feel as though it's appropriate, as a lady, to hold in my farts until I'm in the bathroom or have an alone moment. But, I'm not always sure if they are going to be loud or not, and it's not very ladylike to let out a loud fart, even in a bathroom (he might hear!) so I just have to hold them in sometimes.
This past weekend, my stomach was hurting so bad from holding my farts in that I finally decided to have the fart talk. Actually, on Saturday, when he left for awhile to go home, I farted so loud that one of the kittens was actually scared. Too much buildup. So on Saturday night, I said, I have something to tell you, basically my stomach is hurting so bad from holding my farts in and I can't do it any longer. I think he was glad we had the fart talk because he's been holding in his farts too. Now my stomach will enjoy some freedom from gas buildup.
Once a few years ago, I asked my doctor if there was some kind of medicine he could give me for excessive farting. I thought that I farted a lot more than most people (except Brandy, she is the biggest farter ever). Then I read something on the internet that said most people fart 10 or more times a day. Wow, that makes me feel better, but where are these people farting at? There is also some special seat you can put on your chair and when you fart it absorbs the smell. I secretly thought about getting one but then everyone would ask what it was and then what is the point really? Sometimes I also fart in my sleep, and once in awhile it's so loud that it kinda wakes me up.
Jessica and I were at a wine tasting a month or so ago with Berger and Michael. We went to the bathroom (after tasting MANY different wines) and some older lady farted in the stall while we were on each side of her in the stalls. I tried to be mature and hold in my laughter (cause that happens sometimes, and I'm sure it's worse when you are old) but Jessica was giggling a little bit and I knew why but I waited til we were outside the bathroom. Then we were both laughing and being immature. I think the wine helped bring out the laughter, but it was funny regardless.
There isn't really a point to this blog, except that I hate holding in my farts, but I feel as though I have to because I'm a woman. But, I guess most guys hold in their farts around women, at least until they get to know them better.
We've been hanging out a lot on weekends lately, sometimes almost the entire weekend. I feel as though it's appropriate, as a lady, to hold in my farts until I'm in the bathroom or have an alone moment. But, I'm not always sure if they are going to be loud or not, and it's not very ladylike to let out a loud fart, even in a bathroom (he might hear!) so I just have to hold them in sometimes.
This past weekend, my stomach was hurting so bad from holding my farts in that I finally decided to have the fart talk. Actually, on Saturday, when he left for awhile to go home, I farted so loud that one of the kittens was actually scared. Too much buildup. So on Saturday night, I said, I have something to tell you, basically my stomach is hurting so bad from holding my farts in and I can't do it any longer. I think he was glad we had the fart talk because he's been holding in his farts too. Now my stomach will enjoy some freedom from gas buildup.
Once a few years ago, I asked my doctor if there was some kind of medicine he could give me for excessive farting. I thought that I farted a lot more than most people (except Brandy, she is the biggest farter ever). Then I read something on the internet that said most people fart 10 or more times a day. Wow, that makes me feel better, but where are these people farting at? There is also some special seat you can put on your chair and when you fart it absorbs the smell. I secretly thought about getting one but then everyone would ask what it was and then what is the point really? Sometimes I also fart in my sleep, and once in awhile it's so loud that it kinda wakes me up.
Jessica and I were at a wine tasting a month or so ago with Berger and Michael. We went to the bathroom (after tasting MANY different wines) and some older lady farted in the stall while we were on each side of her in the stalls. I tried to be mature and hold in my laughter (cause that happens sometimes, and I'm sure it's worse when you are old) but Jessica was giggling a little bit and I knew why but I waited til we were outside the bathroom. Then we were both laughing and being immature. I think the wine helped bring out the laughter, but it was funny regardless.
There isn't really a point to this blog, except that I hate holding in my farts, but I feel as though I have to because I'm a woman. But, I guess most guys hold in their farts around women, at least until they get to know them better.
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Update
Just a quick update, nothing too exciting going on lately, here's what happening.
1. Homecoming was a blast, as usual. Heidi wasn't there, but I managed to have a great time. No strip club this year, no winery this year, and no playing the jukebox at Ragsdales this year, but that's ok. It was good time in Cape G.
2. The new winery in Linn Creek is pretty much ok...kinda expensive. The wine tasting at the Country Club Hotel last weekend was awesome, and free! I think I drank too much wine and it gave me drunk Alzheimers.
3. Things are going really well for me. I'm moving into the new house in a few weeks (yay!), the dating arena is awesome, and my job is awesome. I am working 2 nights a week at the Y and it pretty much sucks big time, but I'm giving it some time. Once I start doing more there, it won't be so lame.
4. I am getting 2 new kittens who currently live at my parent's house. Their names are Stanford and Bitsy Von Muffling. I'm not sure if they are boys or girls, but it doesn't matter.
5. I am obsessed with the game Clue. I bought it last weekend for a mere $10. What a bargain!
6. That's all for now, nothing super exciting. I'll update soon!
1. Homecoming was a blast, as usual. Heidi wasn't there, but I managed to have a great time. No strip club this year, no winery this year, and no playing the jukebox at Ragsdales this year, but that's ok. It was good time in Cape G.
2. The new winery in Linn Creek is pretty much ok...kinda expensive. The wine tasting at the Country Club Hotel last weekend was awesome, and free! I think I drank too much wine and it gave me drunk Alzheimers.
3. Things are going really well for me. I'm moving into the new house in a few weeks (yay!), the dating arena is awesome, and my job is awesome. I am working 2 nights a week at the Y and it pretty much sucks big time, but I'm giving it some time. Once I start doing more there, it won't be so lame.
4. I am getting 2 new kittens who currently live at my parent's house. Their names are Stanford and Bitsy Von Muffling. I'm not sure if they are boys or girls, but it doesn't matter.
5. I am obsessed with the game Clue. I bought it last weekend for a mere $10. What a bargain!
6. That's all for now, nothing super exciting. I'll update soon!
Monday, October 6, 2008
More famous sayings by friends or me
1. Good job, blow job.
2. Shut the helicopter door!
3. Please proceed to kiss my ass.
4. Didn't he get the point when I poisoned his drink the last time?
5. Jagerbomb, jagerbomb, asshole!
6. Maybe he hurt his vagina.
7. I miss you like a fat kid misses cake.
8. I miss you like Captain Fuzzy misses his chest razor.
9. Hey Melissa, remember last time when you got gas there?
10. Clark's last name either has to be Griswold or Kent, those are the only choices.
11. You should tell him to put this in his pipe and smoke it.
12. Look, a flying baby with a mustache.
13. Don't forget to roll the dice!
14. At least the girls in Columbia get enough to eat.
15. Is there going to be a plug-in for my fan somewhere close to the tent?
16. Maybe if I stopped drinking beer I would be skinny enough to wear shorts like that.
17. Do you think they make Crocs with velcro straps?
18. His credit card probably just says "Uncle Rico."
19. There was some sweatpants at Kmart that said "true love waits" and the reason it waits is because no one wants to have sex with someone who wears sweatpants from Kmart.
2. Shut the helicopter door!
3. Please proceed to kiss my ass.
4. Didn't he get the point when I poisoned his drink the last time?
5. Jagerbomb, jagerbomb, asshole!
6. Maybe he hurt his vagina.
7. I miss you like a fat kid misses cake.
8. I miss you like Captain Fuzzy misses his chest razor.
9. Hey Melissa, remember last time when you got gas there?
10. Clark's last name either has to be Griswold or Kent, those are the only choices.
11. You should tell him to put this in his pipe and smoke it.
12. Look, a flying baby with a mustache.
13. Don't forget to roll the dice!
14. At least the girls in Columbia get enough to eat.
15. Is there going to be a plug-in for my fan somewhere close to the tent?
16. Maybe if I stopped drinking beer I would be skinny enough to wear shorts like that.
17. Do you think they make Crocs with velcro straps?
18. His credit card probably just says "Uncle Rico."
19. There was some sweatpants at Kmart that said "true love waits" and the reason it waits is because no one wants to have sex with someone who wears sweatpants from Kmart.
Heidi's famous sayings
Here are some of the best sayings by Heidi lately:
1. I'm just going to date really hot guys from now on, because they all end up being assholes anyway.
2. I can give BJs all day and it's not complicated!
3. How many innings in a baseball game? 11?
4. That was fun, Melissa. See I'm serious because I said your name.
5. I think it's because his robot dick malfunctioned.
6. I kissed a girl and I didn't like it.
7. Yeah, I'm pissed off, but it's nothing that 10 beers won't fix.
8. I thought it was Flat Bottom girls, like that's the name of the town they are from.
9. I just do whatever Melissa tells me to do.
10. At least they see a Buick and think it's 2 old ladies driving, little do they know it's two 28 year old girls.
11. Oh great, there are 3 people here and we just pulled up in a Buick listening to Destiny's Child. Let's just go in.
12. I took a crap in every state but Arkansas and I'm not taking a crap there.
13. I am not taking a picture of that bruise, I took one and I seriously thought it was a vagina.
1. I'm just going to date really hot guys from now on, because they all end up being assholes anyway.
2. I can give BJs all day and it's not complicated!
3. How many innings in a baseball game? 11?
4. That was fun, Melissa. See I'm serious because I said your name.
5. I think it's because his robot dick malfunctioned.
6. I kissed a girl and I didn't like it.
7. Yeah, I'm pissed off, but it's nothing that 10 beers won't fix.
8. I thought it was Flat Bottom girls, like that's the name of the town they are from.
9. I just do whatever Melissa tells me to do.
10. At least they see a Buick and think it's 2 old ladies driving, little do they know it's two 28 year old girls.
11. Oh great, there are 3 people here and we just pulled up in a Buick listening to Destiny's Child. Let's just go in.
12. I took a crap in every state but Arkansas and I'm not taking a crap there.
13. I am not taking a picture of that bruise, I took one and I seriously thought it was a vagina.
Highlights from vacation in July
Not sure of the correct spelling...anyway, vacation highlights:
1. Our fridge at the most redneck hotel ever had a beer can holder and the sink had a bottle opener by the Kleenex. The good thing about the Comfort Inn is that you can walk everywhere and they don't care if you steal the luggage cart and drive it around drunk, even to the beach. They do lock the pool at nighttime, which is a good thing because they might have found a sunken luggage cart on Monday morning if not. Another good thing is the relaxing spot behind the pool by the bay where guys who like to wear Crocers or Croafers like to hang out too.
2. Drunk old ladies at the pool are obsessed with us. That's why we had to drink almost all of an 18 pack of Bud Light and a bottle of Malibu the first afternoon. Otherwise I might have drown myself from all the annoying people in Pensacola Beach. One drunk lady told me she was friends with John Mellencamp and that her friend got stung by a jellyfish...I won't mention where, but she told me all the details "What's up girlfriend?!?!" is the favorite phrase of drunk ladies from the pool.
3. Bamboo Willie's is pretty awesome, especially when we meet a guy named Rusty Clark Griswold and he buys us lots of beers and Alabama Slammers. His friend Casty/Ballz Deep will also request Journey to the band. We thought we got kicked out of the bar, but the door guys in Pensacola probably don't care about how stupid we were acting. You can also take your drinks out of the bar and walk around with them, no one even cares. But, it's ok to leave when Bamboo Willie's plays a shitty Jack Johnson cd on a Sunday night. Rusty Clark Griswold also likes to say "Those two are a couple of freaks" and "I'm a morning person" in a dirty South accent.
4. Don't go to McGuires when you are hungover. The smell of bean soup and the dark atmosphere will only make the hangover worse and then you will be forced to stay in bed all day and watch Grandma's Boy 1 1/2 times. "I hate your face." Watching Grandma's Boy is not such a bad thing though, but getting dizzy and sick anytime you move from the pit of despair is not a good thing. The commercial that plays every 5 minutes that makes the tv go crazy sucks too.
5. Everyone is drunk in Pensacola Beach. Some people just sit in their cars in a parking lot and drink beers. Some guys sit around and wait for sober girls who are enjoying their dinner to bother them. Some guys drive around and yell at girls from their trucks. Some go to Dominos while we are eating pizza and are so drunk they can barely walk. Maybe it was a good thing we avoided the beach on Saturday and instead laughed at Grandma's Boy.
6. Affliction shirts and short guys only go to Captain Fun's. You will not find either anywhere else in Pensacola Beach. The older people and rednecks go to Bamboo Willie's, even the Dancing Clapper and the lead singer of REO Speedwagon. Also, Alanis Morisette + REO Speedwagon = Aerosmith.
7. Sandshaker aka Saltshaker is the best bar in Pensacola and it was right next to our hotel. Heidi played Journey one night and everyone in the bar was singing along, it was great. We also met Mike, who gave us his son's phone number and told us that we could come stay at his house and drive his truck and ride his waverunner that goes 60 mph. He also likes Buicks and he loved us. One night we played lots of songs, even Journey like 5x. We also met some 21 yr old hippies and one was rubbing my head forever and wouldn't let me get more than a few inches away. We had to sneak to the bathroom and run out of the bar to get away from him. I had to scare away some gross old guy away from Heidi and he had on velcro shoes. Heidi's anthem at this place was "I kissed a girl, and I didn't like it." Good times at Sandshaker. Also, one night they had a bikini contest and the music was so loud, but we blamed it on our redneck neighbors until Heidi found out the truth.
8. Don't try to push the luggage cart/trolley into the sand. It won't go and you may have a bruise that resembles a vagina on your leg. It's a good idea to take it back so you can use it for its real purpose when you actually put luggage on it and don't try to push it over a curb like Heidi almost did.
9. Is Flat Bottom a real place? I think it is.
10. Gulf Shores has way too many jellyfish. The CEO of Jellyfish, INC was there checking out the situation, but I refuse to get in the water when like 10 jellyfish have been pulled out. No thanks. If you get one, all you have to do is bury it and put a stick in it. Getting a jellyfish tattoo in or around your vagina may or may not be a good idea, but saying "Do you wanna see my jellyfish" is pretty damn funny.
11. We pretty much put the B in Buick. Also, don't assume that because a Buick is going really slow late at night that there are old ladies in there. It might just be a couple of 28 yr old girls listening to Destiny's Child.
12. The touchscreen at Top of the Bay in Alabama is the most pornographic touchscreen ever. If you get the trivia questions right, this gross dude gets naked. The photo hunt was way more nasty than any I've ever seen.
13. The Buick is pretty comfortable even for a 10 hour trip. XM radio will play every Elton John song except Goodbye Yellow Brick Road. But we love when it plays Roxette.
14. Cape is kinda dead on a Tuesday night and the winery is closed. The Crackle/Big Blue Martini is now The Pony, we may have to find out more about that on Homecoming. The same little frat boys hang out in the bars and it reminds me that I'm glad I don't have to deal with that anymore. I kicked ass at Super MarioKart on the Wii though.
15. Arkansas or Mississippi really effed up our phones. They never worked right there and we had missed calls and missed texts because At&t sucks.
16. The bouncy bridge in Memphis makes your car like it has hydrolics, but I wouldn't want to go over it if I was sick.
17. Dick Moore Housing is really the name of a business somewhere along our trip. I hope it's not in the phone book as Moore, Dick.
18. Hellz yeah, hellz no, and roger that are the new best phrases ever.
1. Our fridge at the most redneck hotel ever had a beer can holder and the sink had a bottle opener by the Kleenex. The good thing about the Comfort Inn is that you can walk everywhere and they don't care if you steal the luggage cart and drive it around drunk, even to the beach. They do lock the pool at nighttime, which is a good thing because they might have found a sunken luggage cart on Monday morning if not. Another good thing is the relaxing spot behind the pool by the bay where guys who like to wear Crocers or Croafers like to hang out too.
2. Drunk old ladies at the pool are obsessed with us. That's why we had to drink almost all of an 18 pack of Bud Light and a bottle of Malibu the first afternoon. Otherwise I might have drown myself from all the annoying people in Pensacola Beach. One drunk lady told me she was friends with John Mellencamp and that her friend got stung by a jellyfish...I won't mention where, but she told me all the details "What's up girlfriend?!?!" is the favorite phrase of drunk ladies from the pool.
3. Bamboo Willie's is pretty awesome, especially when we meet a guy named Rusty Clark Griswold and he buys us lots of beers and Alabama Slammers. His friend Casty/Ballz Deep will also request Journey to the band. We thought we got kicked out of the bar, but the door guys in Pensacola probably don't care about how stupid we were acting. You can also take your drinks out of the bar and walk around with them, no one even cares. But, it's ok to leave when Bamboo Willie's plays a shitty Jack Johnson cd on a Sunday night. Rusty Clark Griswold also likes to say "Those two are a couple of freaks" and "I'm a morning person" in a dirty South accent.
4. Don't go to McGuires when you are hungover. The smell of bean soup and the dark atmosphere will only make the hangover worse and then you will be forced to stay in bed all day and watch Grandma's Boy 1 1/2 times. "I hate your face." Watching Grandma's Boy is not such a bad thing though, but getting dizzy and sick anytime you move from the pit of despair is not a good thing. The commercial that plays every 5 minutes that makes the tv go crazy sucks too.
5. Everyone is drunk in Pensacola Beach. Some people just sit in their cars in a parking lot and drink beers. Some guys sit around and wait for sober girls who are enjoying their dinner to bother them. Some guys drive around and yell at girls from their trucks. Some go to Dominos while we are eating pizza and are so drunk they can barely walk. Maybe it was a good thing we avoided the beach on Saturday and instead laughed at Grandma's Boy.
6. Affliction shirts and short guys only go to Captain Fun's. You will not find either anywhere else in Pensacola Beach. The older people and rednecks go to Bamboo Willie's, even the Dancing Clapper and the lead singer of REO Speedwagon. Also, Alanis Morisette + REO Speedwagon = Aerosmith.
7. Sandshaker aka Saltshaker is the best bar in Pensacola and it was right next to our hotel. Heidi played Journey one night and everyone in the bar was singing along, it was great. We also met Mike, who gave us his son's phone number and told us that we could come stay at his house and drive his truck and ride his waverunner that goes 60 mph. He also likes Buicks and he loved us. One night we played lots of songs, even Journey like 5x. We also met some 21 yr old hippies and one was rubbing my head forever and wouldn't let me get more than a few inches away. We had to sneak to the bathroom and run out of the bar to get away from him. I had to scare away some gross old guy away from Heidi and he had on velcro shoes. Heidi's anthem at this place was "I kissed a girl, and I didn't like it." Good times at Sandshaker. Also, one night they had a bikini contest and the music was so loud, but we blamed it on our redneck neighbors until Heidi found out the truth.
8. Don't try to push the luggage cart/trolley into the sand. It won't go and you may have a bruise that resembles a vagina on your leg. It's a good idea to take it back so you can use it for its real purpose when you actually put luggage on it and don't try to push it over a curb like Heidi almost did.
9. Is Flat Bottom a real place? I think it is.
10. Gulf Shores has way too many jellyfish. The CEO of Jellyfish, INC was there checking out the situation, but I refuse to get in the water when like 10 jellyfish have been pulled out. No thanks. If you get one, all you have to do is bury it and put a stick in it. Getting a jellyfish tattoo in or around your vagina may or may not be a good idea, but saying "Do you wanna see my jellyfish" is pretty damn funny.
11. We pretty much put the B in Buick. Also, don't assume that because a Buick is going really slow late at night that there are old ladies in there. It might just be a couple of 28 yr old girls listening to Destiny's Child.
12. The touchscreen at Top of the Bay in Alabama is the most pornographic touchscreen ever. If you get the trivia questions right, this gross dude gets naked. The photo hunt was way more nasty than any I've ever seen.
13. The Buick is pretty comfortable even for a 10 hour trip. XM radio will play every Elton John song except Goodbye Yellow Brick Road. But we love when it plays Roxette.
14. Cape is kinda dead on a Tuesday night and the winery is closed. The Crackle/Big Blue Martini is now The Pony, we may have to find out more about that on Homecoming. The same little frat boys hang out in the bars and it reminds me that I'm glad I don't have to deal with that anymore. I kicked ass at Super MarioKart on the Wii though.
15. Arkansas or Mississippi really effed up our phones. They never worked right there and we had missed calls and missed texts because At&t sucks.
16. The bouncy bridge in Memphis makes your car like it has hydrolics, but I wouldn't want to go over it if I was sick.
17. Dick Moore Housing is really the name of a business somewhere along our trip. I hope it's not in the phone book as Moore, Dick.
18. Hellz yeah, hellz no, and roger that are the new best phrases ever.
Sunday, July 8, 2007
Favorite sayings from this weekend
1. Too bad, we got fireworks!
2. The little signal that we were constantly doing that we can't put into words.
3. No crying, no dying, no being bi.
4. The faces that Jason makes when he's breaking with Jessica on LB.
5. Wait a minute, Heidi (while putting my finger on her nose), be patient.
6. Muscles McGee.
7. The leprachan that said that this might not be the biggest club, but it's the funest.
8. Heidi gave the condom to the security guy.
9. Is that a toliet?, but it really was.
10. Is that a Scout?
11. At least you have Billy. Billy get your ass over here!
12. My finger smells really good.
13. "I'm gonna go find some girl to fuck, yo."
14. Hey Melissa, I have diarrhea, ok bye.
15. Where are you from? St. Louis. Where in St. Louis? Imperial. That's not St. Louis, that's Jefferson County.
16. Who has a Polaroid camera? Is this like 1980?
17. That's probably the best dildo making prison ever.
18. You passed the writing exam? Congratulations, you're not a retard!!
19. We saw Mona from Who's the Boss at party cove.
2. The little signal that we were constantly doing that we can't put into words.
3. No crying, no dying, no being bi.
4. The faces that Jason makes when he's breaking with Jessica on LB.
5. Wait a minute, Heidi (while putting my finger on her nose), be patient.
6. Muscles McGee.
7. The leprachan that said that this might not be the biggest club, but it's the funest.
8. Heidi gave the condom to the security guy.
9. Is that a toliet?, but it really was.
10. Is that a Scout?
11. At least you have Billy. Billy get your ass over here!
12. My finger smells really good.
13. "I'm gonna go find some girl to fuck, yo."
14. Hey Melissa, I have diarrhea, ok bye.
15. Where are you from? St. Louis. Where in St. Louis? Imperial. That's not St. Louis, that's Jefferson County.
16. Who has a Polaroid camera? Is this like 1980?
17. That's probably the best dildo making prison ever.
18. You passed the writing exam? Congratulations, you're not a retard!!
19. We saw Mona from Who's the Boss at party cove.
Monday, June 25, 2007
Funny summer sayings
Ok, I need to compile a list of funny quotes that I use or my friends use this summer. I can refer back to this list and add more, so let me know if you have others.
1. Phil Collins (has many different meanings)
2. I miss you like a fat kid misses cake.
3. I hate that like a fat kid hates vegetables.
4. Where's Tunafun?
5. Jesus? We found Jesus at party cove!
6. Do you like NASCAR? That's nice, well I like orgasms.
7. Where's the inflatable genitalia?
8. Why can't Bonnie (the secretary) operate the phone? Is it not a rotary dial phone?
9. It looks like she got everything from the Punky Brewster and Rainbow Brite yard sale.
10. You need to tell her that Lance Bass wants his boyfriend back.
11. Fug 21
12. Bless you. Thank you. He was already blessed!
13. He's got high hopes (in a singing voice).
14. Where did all of these straws come from?
15. Poke her in the front, lick her in the back.
16. Liquor? But I barely know her.
17. I miss you like a butt misses a lick.
18. Nut-huggers.
19. I've never seen a wheelchair sticker on a pontoon boat. (repeat from last year)
20. You better wipe that up, you are sweating out your $10 drink.
1. Phil Collins (has many different meanings)
2. I miss you like a fat kid misses cake.
3. I hate that like a fat kid hates vegetables.
4. Where's Tunafun?
5. Jesus? We found Jesus at party cove!
6. Do you like NASCAR? That's nice, well I like orgasms.
7. Where's the inflatable genitalia?
8. Why can't Bonnie (the secretary) operate the phone? Is it not a rotary dial phone?
9. It looks like she got everything from the Punky Brewster and Rainbow Brite yard sale.
10. You need to tell her that Lance Bass wants his boyfriend back.
11. Fug 21
12. Bless you. Thank you. He was already blessed!
13. He's got high hopes (in a singing voice).
14. Where did all of these straws come from?
15. Poke her in the front, lick her in the back.
16. Liquor? But I barely know her.
17. I miss you like a butt misses a lick.
18. Nut-huggers.
19. I've never seen a wheelchair sticker on a pontoon boat. (repeat from last year)
20. You better wipe that up, you are sweating out your $10 drink.
Thursday, June 7, 2007
Recent horoscope
Horoscope for June 7, 2007
The Moon, ruler of our emotions, is in Pisces, the sign of being in touch with a good hunch. Non-verbal cues will allow you to quickly assess who is available and who is off limits. Can you trust your judgment to pick a good possible conquest?
The Moon, ruler of our emotions, is in Pisces, the sign of being in touch with a good hunch. Non-verbal cues will allow you to quickly assess who is available and who is off limits. Can you trust your judgment to pick a good possible conquest?
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